would you? could you? in a box?

Congratulations, Jen on the Edge! You've won a copy of Alyssa Goodnight's Unladylike Pursuits! Happy reading!

We attended a wedding over the weekend--and yes, I wore a dress! In the olden days when I tended bar, I could pretty accurately predict the success rate of a couple based on their combined level of sobriety by the time they hopped onto bar stools in front of me mid-day. I fear the future looks a tad bleak for this weekend's couple. The groom puked in the parking lot between "post-ceremony party bus" and reception hall. His 21-year-old bride slapped him. Then she grabbed a plastic pitcher to use as her personal beer mug--all night. I watched her pose for drinking pictures with her girlfriends and dance with the pitcher held over her head, Miller Lite sloshing over the sides. She did not make the rounds to green her 500 wedding guests, preferring to stay ensconced in the company of a few friends all night. To his credit, the groom did make it around to greet us just as we were getting ready to leave so we could make it home by midnight.
The flowers were stunning, the food was good and we sat by nice people. And we didn't have to endure an insufferable slide show, either. So, would you take the over or the under on this couple?

Ironically, Sunday's sermon at church was about the seventh commandment and how to avoid breaking it.

The really funny part about this wedding came later in the night. A friend of ours who works in research and development for A Corporation That Must Remain Unnamed asked me if I'd buy the latest project he's been working on. "What do you think about disposable towels in a box for your bathroom counter?"
"What the what?" I asked, a stunned smile plastered on my face. Surely I misheard him because that has to be the most unnecessary, wasteful and ridiculous thing in the world--disposable paper bathroom towels!
"Disposable towels. In a box. For your bathroom or kitchen."
"Towels in a box," I repeated. "Paper towels?" Scorn crept into my voice.
"Yes," he nodded, "in a box. For single use--you grab them out of a counter top dispenser."
"Ummmm, probably not. I just use regular towels and wash them."
"You must not be a germophobe then," he said, laughing.
Mr. D, catching on to my discomfort, chimed in with, "And she's green, too."
"Green?"
"J, she doesn't even let me use paper towels anymore. I can only use a couple when we make bacon. It's (Mr. D employs air quotes) 'Wasteful.' She's sure as heck not going to buy them for in the bathroom."
I did feel grateful to my husband for taking me off the hot seat.

Reader, I'm curious about how this company plans to market a single-use product. It's wasteful, for starters. It's definitely NOT environmentally friendly. I understand disposable towels in public bathrooms, but for home use? And I cannot begin to fathom the price point of paper towels in a box.
Spill it, reader--would you buy this product? If so, what are its merits?

Posted in: i'm betting the bride and groom looked a little green the next morning