sweet

We can't get enough clementines here at Chez Green Girl.  Right now they're SO sweet.

Last night it was all STANCES at karate class.  My thighs burned, but not in a lusty kind of way.  More in a Sweet Jesus make him STOP MAKING US STANDING IN A FRONT STANCE THE BURNING OH THE BURNING kind of way.  Unfortunately for me and Mr. B, 2nd degree class started Chung Mu, a traditional open hand form that requires--yup, you guessed it--a lot of stances.  Slow, aching, stances and moving from one to the other without changing the height of your head.   If my legs are totally toned by the end of February, there's no excuse.  So, this morning while I watched a bit of TV news and Clay Matthews was being interviewed, I felt achy.  And burning.  Kind of hot.  Might have been residual pain from karate class. 

Seriously--real life THOR plays for the Packers.  I'm a little bummed we can't go to the game tomorrow night.  Mr. G's in a basketball tournament all day and there's NO way we can make it work out logistically so we gave up our tickets.  But we will be home in time to watch it on TV.  And we'll be warmer that we'd be at Lambeau.

I wrapped up an editing job 6 days ahead of schedule.  Two loaves of banana bread are cooling on the kitchen counter.  I started reading Cold Comfort Farm by Stella Gibbons last night and she writes like PG Wodehouse which pleases me very much.

Spill it, reader.  What's sweet in your world today?

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team marvel

I'll be honest here:  I never knew the difference before I got married.  My knowledge of comic book heroes came from Saturday morning cartoons.  Marinating in a stew of testosterone for the second half of my life has expanded my knowledge considerably.  I think it started when Mr. D and I used to watch the X-Men on Saturday mornings before we had kids. 

Then along came Batman and Spiderman.  My sons began watching the TV series and movies and reading the books.  Gradually I started to pick up on the subtle differences between actual super powers and being a super hero.  I began to understand the background, evil nemesis (nemesi?), relationships and mythology for various characters.

We took the whole Avengers thing pretty seriously over here, piecing together Thor, Captain America, Iron Man, Black Widow, Hawkeye and Hulk.  And we've closely followed The X-Men and The Amazing Spiderman.  (I, for one, am eagerly awaiting the Black Widow's movie because she is FIERCE.)  We're speculating what will happen in Avengers 2 and in the next X-Men movie.

Then I saw an announcement this week about a Justice League movie in the works and I guffawed.  Sorry, DC Comics, but you don't have it going on.  You did nice work with The Batman franchise, but other than that, it's been a flop.  If this film ever does come to fruition, I'm not hopeful and here's why:

* You've failed to create the back story for your other characters.  The Avengers worked because Iron Man, Captain America and Thor laid the groundwork.  Each film incorporated the big picture and provided a little bit of connection, luring us from the individual character's stories into the big united front.
* You take yourself too seriously.  Other than The Flash, your superheroes offer no levity or humor.  Batman is a total downer of a dude.  Superman is stern and self-righteous.  Most people don't even know who Aquaman is.  On the flip side, Captain America appreciates the goofiness of his situation (frozen and thawed out 60 years later), Iron Man's a crazy genius and when he's not Hulk, Bruce Banner understands the big picture because he's also a genius.
*  You don't include female characters in a meaningful way.  I'm part of the 52% of the viewing population that likes to see ladies kick ass.  Rogue, Natalia "Natasha" Alianovna (AKA Black Widow) and Storm are pretty fierce. Even the gals who play sidekicks, like Gwen Stacy and Pepper Potts have moxie and ferocity.  In DC-land, the sidekicks are helpless reporter types who sit on the sidelines like Lois Lane and Vicki Vale.  YAWN.
*  You don't include mortals in a meaningful way either.  As a mere mortal, I like the idea of mortals and superheroes working together to save the planet from impending doom.  Bruce Wayne's about the only DC superhero with manmade super powers and even he doesn't put much stock in his fellow human. 

You won't see me standing in line to watch any Justice League movie, I'm firmly on Team Marvel, though I do appreciate the mythic heroes DC has created. 

And yes, reader, the fact that I've even given this so much thought proves I'm a bigger geek than one ever though thought possible.

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she's THAT mom

All day long I squawk at the boys, "FIND SOMETHING TO DO."  I'm forever shooing them away from TV sets and video games all week and offering to help them figure out what to do if they're so bored.  The minute I think I have them settled into an activity, I turn away to try to accomplish something myself (because I, unlike them, have no shortage of THINGS TO DO) and I hear the electronic theme music from the Wii.  And we're back to step one where I'm shouting "TURN OFF THE DAMN SCREEN AND FIND SOMETHING TO DO!"

Because it's summer vacation and for the love of all things holy we live in Wisconsin where you're snowbound for 6 months out of the year with nothing better to do than zone out in front of a screen.

Sheesh.

So, last night Mr. T, Mr. B and I rolled in from karate class and found Mr. G (guess where!  You'll never guess ...) in front of the TV.  He'd discovered WWE and was ecstatic.  The holy grail of male entertainment.  Comic book heroes and villains,  and man-on-man violence come to life.  In other words, Nirvana.

The gang starts school next Tuesday, so I had this foggy notion that we'd get to bed kind of early all week in a feeble attempt to put our bodies on a schedule.  After the next commercial break, I told Mr. G (and now Mr. B who sat beside him, breathlessly watching the drama play out on Live Television!) to shut her down. 

Upstairs we went and on went the jammies and in went the toothbrushes.  And then?

Those knucklehead kids started TO PLAY.  In their room.  They dragged out the dusty Brio train set and began laying track.  Mr. G stacked pillows and began practicing the pile drive move he'd learned from Sin Cara.  Together they giggled, talked, stacked, arranged and PLAYED.

Just like I'd been begging them to all day long.

You can imagine my conundrum--remind them that they had all day to goof around and do these things and now it's time for bed OR close the door and let them play it out.  But school starts next Tuesday and I have an obligation to get these goobers on a schedule.  On the other hand, they'll get off schedule over Labor Day weekend when we have plans.  It's so hard being a mom, I tell you. 

You bet I told them good night, shut the door and went to bed.  I think they played until about 10:30 before they dropped.  I guess some battles aren't worth the fight.

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the trouble with being superhuman

In case you're going on Friday, you should probably watch this.

And speaking of being superhuman (like the queen), am I the only one not enthralled by this summer's trio of superheroes offered up by the movie studios? Thor? Green Lantern? Captain America? No, thanks. Is it the casting or the fact that none of these guys were big players in the Justice League of my childhood? I'd be interested to watch AquaMan or Flash, but these other guys make me yawn.


My plate is overflowing, in no small part due to the popular perception that I am superhuman and can handle it all. Like an ornery child I'm pushing things around into different piles, smushing the potatoes into the peas and pretending that it looks finished enough to be excused from the table. How's that working out for me? About how you'd think. It's a matter of time before I'm busted for hiding the brussel sprouts under my napkin ...

Superhuman writer and humorist Jen Lancaster had a few thoughts on "couponing" the other day. I'll leave you laughing while I sneak this piece of roast beef under the table and feed it to Jax--the old "dog ate my homework" trick never fails ...

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eco-holiday

Three years ago this week Jen on the Edge and I started a little eco-blog called Eco Women: Protectors of the Planet. We shared a vision of a website that could teach people how to behave friendlier to the environment. We aren't super-crunchy-granola (what with liking to shave our armpits and eat the occasional Hostess Twinkie), but we aren't greenwashing the topic by encouraging people to buy more stuff or do nothing and feel good about it. We're those environmental activists in the middle, teaching people how to do right by Earth without spending money or totally uprooting their lifestyles. Since then we've added to the legions of Eco Women (and a couple Eco Men), steering people away from single-use plastic products like shopping bags and water bottles, encouraging people to dig deep and plant their own food, calling out the polluting industries and applauding the companies committed to shrinking their carbon footprints. We've covered "green sex" and "eco-friendly tourism." We've addressed what to eat, wear, buy (or, more likely, NOT buy), smear, spray, unplug and pour--all in the name of saving the environment from pollution.

To celebrate our three year blogiversary over at Eco Women, we're giving away THREE Eco Women canvas shopping bags. To enter to win, you've only got to visit the site and leave a comment.
I do hope none of my readers need this shopping bag--y'all already gave up plastic shopping bags eons ago, right? RIGHT?

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green, mean & clean

Two years! It's been TWO YEARS since Jen on the Edge AKA Recycla and Enviro Girl started Ecowomen.net and it's amazing how the word has spread about environmental issues. We've borne witness to ordinary people becoming Eco Warriors, whether it's by biking to work or growing some of their own food or downsizing to consume less. Two years and they've taken on heavy issues like chemical additives in food, alternative energy, plastic shopping bags (boo! hiss!) and bottled water.

TWO YEARS and they've added THREE writers to the group: Amy AKA Captain Compost, Marni Graff AKA Eco Lassie, Kim Kasch AKA The Green Queen and Kirstin AKA The Green Mommy.

To celebrate TWO YEARS of Ecowomen.net, the fabulous Eco Women are running fabulous giveaways all week long. Quit stalling and follow the link to leave a comment.

And if you want to leave a comment here, share how you've become greaner and meaner in the last TWO YEARS!

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we're getting veeeeery sleeeeepy

This morning Mr. B has an EEG and to prepare for that he has to be sleep deprived. I took the night shift, which wasn't bad since Mr. B's a night owl by nature. We watched videos, played games, did a puzzle, ate some ice cream. At midnight he went to bed. The deal was for Mr. D to wake him at 5:00--the harder end of this bargain. Naturally he overslept and didn't wake Mr. B until 6:00--he's still pretty tired, though, and I'm hoping tired enough for today's test. I'm tired enough for today's test.

When is a tic just a tic? Hard to say.

Not this kind of tick.

Mr. B started having facial tics about a month or two ago. These are more common in boys, and often "just a phase." We haven't made much of it, but we have one son with an Absence Seizure Disorder and facial tics are one side effect. We've also noticed Mr. B occasionally "zoning out," which isn't unusual behavior for a 7-year-old boy, but Mr. T's seizure disorder is genetic which means we have a good shot at having another child with the same disorder. And (bonus!) boys get the seizure disorder 4 times the rate of girls. We have all boy children. This isn't our first rodeo. (Darn, that saying sounds much cooler than it looks typed here.) The EEG determines whether Mr. B is having seizures. Or not. Preferably not.

It was upsetting to learn about Mr. T's seizures--scary and we still don't have any guarantees that he'll outgrow them someday. It has disrupted life for him in a lot of ways. But we know the treatment options, we have health insurance, we like our family doctor and the pediatric neurologist is a fairly decent sort, too. We have resources to diagnose and treat this disease.

I'd still prefer to hear the tic is just a tic. Stay tuned.

Our sense of humor here is still intact.

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this 'n that

I did some "redecorating" at Chez Green Girl this weekend--I took out the boys' old Little Tykes art easel and replaced it with this old shelving unit from our basement. They do their projects at the kitchen table and really only needed a spot for their supplies. Much cleaner, much more organized, takes up less space and cost me nothing. My pre-holiday purge was so successful that I even have an extra empty shelf and an empty Rubbermaid tub.

I also deep-sixed a bulky wreath that used to hang by our front door. I like the look of this tin thing and will fill it with things I pick in the prairie and fields later. The little paintings are from Mr. D's grandma--they hung in her house and no one wanted them when they moved her to a nursing home. I took them--very cute little drawings of scenes in Paris. When I removed the glass that covered them, they were bright and cheery. Years of cigarette and candle smoke hid their true colors, I'm sure if anyone else had looked closer, they'd have snapped them up. A little white paint covered the faux gold frames and now my front hall looks fresh and interesting. I keep walking over to admire the effect.


Our entire town is glazed with ice and it took 3 tries to get up my driveway. It's also frickin' cold outside, so I've no desire to head up the hill and deal with it. Taking Mr. T to school was typically awful--I'm convinced that over half of the Happyland Elementary Minivan Moms have had lobotomies. Or they're drunk. They drive and drop off their kids like idiots. I don't relish leaving the house again to retrieve kids later. I slid across the parking lot dropping off Mr. G and I'm a little worried because there's no end to this sub-zero weather in sight so when will this melt? Yikes!

Mr. D and I finally watched The Dark Knight (Yes, I know I'm like the second to last person in America to watch it now). I think Bob Kane would've been very pleased. It's nice to see the Batman's storylines back to their original gloom and darkness--I was disappointed that Two-Face lived such a short time, though. Does anyone know why Rachel Dawes was recast? We also watched Dan in Real Life which was the most pleasant use of 2 hours. National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation seen in small doses is even funnier when you know what's going to happen. Our bed shook with my giggling. So damn hilarious.

The death of John Travolta's son makes me very sad. Typically, a lot of people are judging their son's illness and treatment, but I hope this raises awareness of how dangerous seizure disorders are--and that they're not "cured" with medication. We're nearly done weaning Mr. T off his meds to see if he's outgrown his seizures. Some seziure meds are effective, some come with terrible side effects (as I've previously described with Mr. T--depression, liver damage, mood swings), some meds counteract other types of medicine (for example, a kid taking seizure control meds cannot use ADHD meds) and sometimes you take a kid off meds hoping to find they're all better--but what if they're not?

Pam over at Nature, Nurture and Nudgings is having a contest--she's giving away 10 of her handmade cards. Go check it out!

Mr. T and I just finished reading Swindle by Gordon Korman--if you have a reader aged 9-13, I highly recommend it. Funny, fast-paced, and imaginative. And a wonderful break from the fantasty fiction dominating the market.

Happy Monday!

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Tell them Mrs. Weasley knit it

While the thermometer dropped 30 degrees and the clouds rolled in, I hunkered down with Foyle's War, Doc Martin and my knitting needles. A hobby well suited for cool weather, and this time I have a project with a deadline.

Mr. T wants to be Harry Potter this Halloween. Not his first choice of costume, but because of our school's ban on masks and weapons, his first ten choices were a bust. (And can I mention how TOTALLY LAME those rules are? In a rural district, a kid can't even dress like a deer hunter with a fake cardboard gun in hand because, "Oh no! Someone might get the wrong idea! And no light sabers or swords either!" But little girls can dress like tramps, sluts, Bratz and stereotypical Disney princesses without anyone worrying about the message sent by bright blue eyeshadow and miniskirts and cleavage.) I digress...

We can embellish our Hogwarts robe, wand (a weapon? Probably, but I'm sending it along because I'm itching for a fight these days) and glasses with a handknit scarf in Gryffindor colors! We can buy one for $20.00 on the internet (not a land of bargains in this case) or knit one up myself for $3.00 and provide myself with hours of entertainment. We all win because Mr. T will have a totally awesome costume and I have a creative outlet.

The scarf after 2 Ace of Cakes, 1 Doc Martin, 1 Foyle's War and Ice Age.

So I knit away, giddy with my progress up and around Mr. T's neck and with all my favorite shows returning with new episodes (Pushing Daisies! The Office!). It almost makes up for the loss of my favorite popcorn, salad dressing and spaghetti sauce guy (oh, he made some damn fine films, too). Maybe Mr. G would like a knitted Spidey suit for Halloween...I can get more red yarn and dig out some black...

This is some guy named Mark Newport who knits superhero suits.

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You can call me Princess Diana

She looks just like me! Except my boots are green rubber and don't have heels and pointed toes. I totally rock the bustier and the silver bracelets, though. Wonder Woman, the ultimate warrior, began as "Princess Diana," the daughter of the Queen of the Amazons, molded out of clay by Zeus. Blessed by the gods with remarkable powers and trained by her Amazon sisters, she ventured into the world to aid humankind. (I know, my knowledge of comic book heroes and stories is freakishly awesome.)

So far "Princess Diana" isn't catching on as my alter ego name. I tried "Shayera Hol," but with various speech impediments afflicting Mr. B and Mr. G ("Bruce" and "Peter Parker"), I quickly abandoned any dream of adopting Hawkgirl as my secret identity.

I have a lot in common with Wonder Woman, as it turns out. The beige minivan is a pretty invisible means of transport and I use my arms as a magic lasso to capture and restrain ornery children. If I could just figure out how to make these damn bracelets fix dinner and do the laundry, I'd embrace my inner Amazon goddess ...

***

In baseball news, Mr. D's team has a huge double-header tonight. Our calendar says only a couple weeks of baseball remain. Part of me is glad for that--our crazy schedule is on my last nerve and I'll be glad for what passes for "normal" to return. Part of me is sad because I know how much Mr. D loves this team and all of his seniors. It's been a great run for them and when it ends it'll be tough, especially since next year's team won't be as strong. They're clinging to every game and every practice now, knowing it'll soon be over. They're rewriting baseball history in this town right now and I'm so proud of their effort and how it's paying off. I never would've predicted this story for Mr. D as a coach--it's great to see him love something so passionately and be so successful at it. The man has done a lot of things I've admired, but coaching the way he does definitely makes the top 10 list.

***

In Mr. T news, the Big Dyslexia Testing takes place this afternoon. Finally we move forward with gathering information. Finally we'll be equipped to make decisions about this summer and next fall. Finally I can lop a Big Project off of my To-Do List. It'll be lovely to figure out just a portion of what makes that kid tick.

***

Last night at Mr. T's soccer practice Mr. B made a new friend. She asked him, "What's your name?" He replied, "It's complicated. When I was born I had a different name, but then I changed it." Then he looked at me, confusion etched on his brow. I looked at the girl and cut to the chase for him. "Just call him Bruce." Mr. B smiled and they ran to play tag.

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Living with Alter Egos

Bruce Wayne

Mr. B has changed his name--granted he's only changed 3 letters of his given name, but it's tough to remember to call him "Bruce." He won't answer to anything else, but he's forgiving of his preschool teacher and his karate instructor while they adjust to the new name. I knew it was only a matter of time, he has been madly in love with the Batman since he was a year old. Every Halloween he wears a Batman costume (except one where he forayed into Marvel Comics and donned a Spiderman costume). He sleeps on Batman sheets, wears Batman t-shirts, carries a Batman backpack and owns a slew of Batman toys and action figures. Last week he announced that he "officially" changed his name to "Bruce" and we need to address him as such.

In true Monkey-See-Monkey-Do style, Mr. G has followed suit. He also uses "Man" in his superhero last name, but his "street name" is now "Peter Parker." Not "Pete" or "Peter," but "Peter Parker."


Last night we played Sequence Jr. It sounded like this:

Me: Okay, it's your turn, Mr. G.
Mr. G: I'm Peter Parker.
Me: Sorry. Peter Parker, it's your turn.
Mr. G: (takes his turn) It's Peter Parker, Mom.
(play continues)
Me: Mr. B, go!
Mr. B: It's Bruce, Mom.
Me: Right. Sorry. Bruce, take your turn. All right, Pete, you go now.
Mr. G: Peter Parker.
Me: Sorry!
Mr. G: Peter Parker. Your turn, Batman.
Mr. B: I'm not Batman right now, I'm Bruce.

Who won the game, you ask? It's not a MARVELous winner, the Dark Knight won.

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